7 Secrets to Conquering the Guest List

We've all heard that the guest list is the number one place to cut wedding costs.  Allow me to add that the guest list can be one of the first wedding-related argument you may have with your families. Don't let it be! But before you freak out from guest list stress, learn how to conquer your guest list.

1.  Break it on down - You've got your venue, and you know the cost-per-plate or the maximum number the venue will hold. Typically, your reception takes up approximately half of your wedding budget, so take your budget and chop it in half.  Here's the money you have to spend on the reception food and drink.  Divide this number by the cost-per-plate, and you've got the number of wedding guests you can comfortably afford to accommodate.

2.  Now add 20% - The typical guest list has a 20% decline rate.  I know you can't imagine anyone who wouldn't come to your wedding, but trust me... life happens.  Some people won't make it.  So feel free to add some people to your guest list, assuming some will decline. It is not a hard and fast rule, but a pretty good estimate.

3.  Share the wealth - Welcome to being a team player.  If your parents are helping with the wedding (and even if they're not), it's polite to give them a chunk of the guest list. A good rule: You and your fiancé create 50% of the guest list.  Your parents create 25%, and his parents create 25%. 

4.  One year - If you haven't seen or spoken to someone in a year, only add that person if you have wiggle room in the guest list.  Facebook doesn't count.  I'm talking a meaningful, you-make-my-life-better conversation.  Elementary and high-school friends should meet this criterion, too.  

5.  Tiers - Categorize your guests.  Tier A = the VIPs (grandparents, siblings, first cousins, wedding party).  Tier B = close friends.  Tier C = co-workers, other friends, and randoms (hair stylist, your neighbors).  If you need to eliminate people or a group for any reason, start from the bottom.  

6.  To Plus-One, or not Plus-One? - It is considered by some acceptable to give people an 'and guest' if you're close to them, and no 'and guest' if you're not.  I say consider everyone over the age of 18 gets a plus one. Imagine being invited to a wedding where you basically knew no one.

7.  Don't give in to the people who invite themselves - Remember that 'one year' rule we just talked about?  Stick to it.  Don't let people invite themselves - just say "Thanks for being excited for us!  I wish we could invite everyone!"